”Dear friend:
I am a planner. I am helping Ted plan for the All Bay Area Leadership Summit coming up the 20th and 21st of this month—I trust you received the email we sent regarding that on Friday. I have always been a planner. I remember when my kids were really young, I was already thinking about my grandchildren! I used to plan all my ballet classes in the summer so that I was ready when dance started in the fall. By the end of February each year, I had created my children’s homeschooling plan for the following school year and would have already purchased their online classes. As you can see, I love systems and thrive when I get to organize something. My kids tease me because I’m always re-organizing the house to make it more efficient as our seasons of life change. Having things organized and systematized gives me a high, I just love it!
The Dark Side of Planning
This gift has a downside. Sometimes I focus so much on the future, that I miss what God is doing in the present. This is an issue in my life that the Lord has consistently had to deal with me.
My habits were forcibly changed when I had circumstances out of my control and got sick with pernicious anemia. As the disease progressed, I stopped being able to write, walk and basically move at will. Even right now after two years of healing, I still need to flow with what’s going on in my body. If I have a nerve flare, I have to be more active because the exercise combats the inflammation. When the nerves are doing well, I get to rest more. My body is not my own, and I’ve had to learn to be flexible because I can’t plan things when I want to. For example, in the past I would have had this inspirational completely finished at least one month in advance. Now, I have to wait until my body will let me write and type without much pain, this means I was working on it just 2 days before it goes out (then I hand it off to Ted at the last minute). In the past, this would drive me crazy, but now I just have to accept it as the way things are. This happens so many times that I am completely dependent on the Lord and trust in Him to feel good enough to type before the deadline. And the Lord has been faithful each single time!
I hope you enjoy these inspirationals, but regardless, they minister to me and I know each one is a testimony of the grace of God in my life.
Don't Miss Out on the Present
Why am I sharing this? Because when we over focus on the future, we might be missing out on what the Lord is doing in the present. Do you know that you are making history at this moment? History is simply the story of our lives and when our lives belong to God he uses every single moment for his glory even if those moments are excruciatingly hard or purely mundane.
Sometimes the Present is Too Hard
Sometimes we go through such hard circumstances that we can’t wait until those disappear and we are on the other side. While that’s good, because it means we have hope in God, it’s also important to face the present and keep our hearts thankful for what he is doing right in that moment. It is easy to become anxious speculating about what’s going to happen, but the reality is that we can’t control the future. We can only give the present to the Lord.
“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God”
Philippians 4:6-7
I'm a History Maker
Whenever I feel discouraged and tired of dealing with the same things over and over again, I've learned to say to myself, “I am making history at this moment.” I might not see it, but my days are counted in the book of life and they are precious before the Lord. Who knows… this moment might change someone’s life, including mine. My suffering might help someone else. In my case, all that I’ve gone through has at least given me an abundance of writing material! Although I wish the Lord had used another way to give me writing material, I won't complain.
“Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written
in your book
before one of them came to be.”
Psalm 139:16
“I might die tomorrow, but today I'm going to teach a good ballet class...”
One of these “cease the moment” times that I remember well, was when I was teaching dance and could barely move. Ironically, one of the only things that I could still do was teaching dance. I couldn’t drive, so Ted or one of my children would drive me to dance class. They carried my bag, pillow and whatever gadget I needed to be more functional. By that point it was hard to stand, walk or sit, so I might stand for a little bit and then lay down for most of the class. I remember one day, I was in pain and it was hard just to get into the studio. It was discouraging and painful. But then the Holy Spirit turned my thoughts in another direction, “These girls are so committed and such a joy to work with. If I die tomorrow, at least I taught a good ballet class and made someone happy.” I forced myself to smile and focus on them and on the moment at hand. The result was that I not only left the class emotionally filled up, but even my pain decreased!
What if Jesus Had Skipped the Crucifixion?
Sometimes God has to get ahold of us in extreme ways to make us understand that he wants us to live in the present and trust him. Jesus had to go through the crucifixion before the resurrection. He couldn’t skip that. Those moments that we think are our hardest and most difficult—all we want is to get out of them—are the very moments God is using to perfect us and launch us into something new and wonderful!
Other times it is the day-to-day routine that gets to us. What if Jesus had given up before he started his ministry? He spent most of his life unknown, working as a carpenter, taking care of his mother and siblings. That kind of life was not very flashy. He was not one of the elite religious leaders. He didn’t rule a country, nor was he an important political figure. He kind of grew up as a “normal Jewish guy.” He was of the lineage of David, but his family where poor peasants and his mother a widow. Eventually though, he would become the most influential person in history. His story not only changed the world but also our lives.
Hope in the Future,
but Rejoice in the Moment
We need to have hope in the future, but balance that by knowing that we are making history during our hard moments. God is going to use those difficulties for his glory. It is all about embracing the process. I dream of the day when I can type and write at will, go for long trips in a car, be more flexible in my hamstrings, enjoy a worship service without having to exercise in the nursing mothers room, and many other little things a normal person can do.
Someday by the grace of God, I’ll be able to do all those things. But what happens if I stop living in the moment and become anxious because I can’t do them yet? I’ll miss out on God‘s blessings in my life. I want to enjoy my amazing family, God’s daily provision, his love, all the things God is doing through the ministry, etc!
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
Matthew 6:34
God has a bigger plan than I do. He is the ultimate planner, not me. I’m choosing to focus on the moment and enjoy the ride. Who knows…this moment might change history!
Sandra Hahs
P.S. Speaking of planning, plan to join us October 20 & 21 for the All Bay Area Leadership Summit. This is about followers of Jesus from various sectors, ministries and backgrounds collaborating together to fulfill the great commission. Register now, the early bird deadline is October 6th. If you are out of town we have negotiated a great rate at the beautiful Pruneyard Doubletree. We'd love to have you join us. Click here for more information.
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